....and the crazy gets even crazier!!!!

So every break up is hard.  Many people go through a short window where there is harsh communication between both parties.  I am there.

The reality of what happened and how it's being remembered is driving me crazy.  I am being accused of things that I did not do and the playback is SO far off from reality that I feel compelled to explain what really went on even though I know I should just stop communication all together.

Below is a series of emails from the past two days.  The first email is my response to something he wrote me.  The bullet points are his.  My response is below.  It just really seems like he doesn't get it at all and if you read my other posts you can see me write about these points I'm making before AND after the breakup.

1. going thru my stuff - You do this a lot and I really don't care, but you make up stories in your head about what is going on then attack me without talking to me. It's been an ongoing problem I thought I could endure but then I imagined spending the rest of my life with you under those circumstances, and then realized I couldn't live like that. I don't see a future when I have to prove myself to you all the time.

My response:
I snooped because you produced an air of secrecy.   Not letting me meet your friends, calling me San Francisco, hiding texting and phone calls from me, clearing your private data if I needed to use your computer. lying about still being on dating websites and list goes on and on and on of things that made you suspect.

oh and one I just starting witnessing... you would block me when you would get on ichat sometimes.  Why the hell would someone do that?!  I DON"T KNOW!  I HAVE NO EVIDENCE BUT GETTING BLOCKED FROM TIME TO TIME!

You KNOW you did these things!  Don't even try to deny them! 

2. constant accusals of cheating - mostly stem from the above, but being on the recieving end of it really sucks.

My response:
I never regularly accused you of cheating.  I accused you of being secretive and possibly having inapropriate emotional relationships much like ours when you were with Anna.  Please read this again:  http://piecingmypuzzle.blogspot.com/2010/08/please-read-and-see-attachments.html

3. verbal abuse - please refer to the emails you have sent me over the past week. copying and pasting here would just be redundant.

My response:
Telling you how I feel about certain things is not verbal abuse.  Calling me a cunt and telling me the shut the fuck up all the time is.

3. emotional abuse - refer to the emails once again. those are references you make toward me most of the time and I'm over it.

My response:
I did the farthest from this.  I coddled you.  If you were upset I begged you to cuddle snuggle (Use that Friday I had to work at the living room as a good example of that)  I tried to get you to "come back to me"  and you KNOW this too. How many times have a nicely asked you to "come back to me"?  HOW many times have I asked "Are you ok?  Are you mad at me?"  Cause you were ALWAYS mad at me and could blow a gasket at any time.  THAT is emotional abuse honey. 

4. you want nothing to do with my family (your words)

My response:
You created this.  By telling me bad things that they say about me all the time when they have absolutely NO reason to.  You created a situation where I was so uncomfortable to be around them cause they all talk so much shit about me.  I did nothing to deserve these judgements and why the fuck would you tell me these things?  What purpose did it serve other than hurting me?  Please ask yourself.

5. I can't have friends that you don't approve of.

My response:
This is the biggest bullshit I've ever read.  I BEGGED to be introduced to your friends and be part of your peer group!!!!  BEGGED!  YOU NEVER LET ME!  You wouldn't invite me into your peer group.  I was an outsider the entire time!  You know this is true because we had lengthy discussion about it multiple times!!!  I "approve" of ALL your friends I just wanted to MEET THEM!!!!

 A second email from me: (A bit mean of me but very honest at the same time)

"***** is laughing right.  She remembers what i remember the same way
and thinks its funny how many times she heard you change your stories
right in front of her all the time.  Its pretty funny to her right
now.     wiah you could see what we see honey"

Prince Charming's response:

"then you should tell her about the inappropriate text messages and phone calls you would make from my phone to tiffany and brittany between 1:30a and 4am. please get help! stop emailing me!"

 When I got THIS last night I was floored!!!!  WHAT?!  Is he talking about the texts that I took pictures of?  Um.. I was in SF and he was in Long Beach when those texts were exchanged!!

And when is this 1:30am - 4am date that he is talking about?!  Whu?


He has this software on his phone that allows him to call from another number.  When I didn't want to talk to him for one reason or another he would call from my sons number KNOWING I would pick up the call. (I have NO Idea how this works and how it's legal)  Did he use that and text her from my phone number?!


REALLY WTF IS HE TALKING ABOUT?!  I held his phone snooping ONCE and would NEVER send a text to ANY OF HIS CONTACTS!!    And Brit?!  The first I ever heard about her was 24 hours before we broke up?!


Is he accusing me of doing this for months? I ONLY SNOOPED A COUPLE WEEKS AGO!  After we broke up?  IMPOSSIBLE!  I LEFT RIGHT AWAY THE NEXT MORNING and trust me he didn't leave his phone anywhere close to me!


I have thought about this for an entire day and all I can come up with is that HE sent these texts at whatever point in time AFTER we broke up  and TOLD THEM that I stole his phone and did this!!? OR He is blaming his OWN ummm and quote "inappropriate" texts on me while we were together.. WHAT?!?!  So he defamed MY character with a LIE to get these people to hate me and so he can become a victim?


FAIR!  Emotional pain makes you do STUPID STUFF.. But then to accuse me of doing it knowing full well that I NEVER DID?!?!?  INSANE!!!!!


Time stamps on these mysterious texts I sent?   IF THEY MATCH UP WITH US BEING TOGETHER THEY WERE HIS INAPPROPRIATE TEXTS!!!  IF THEY DON'T  HE SENT THEM AFTER OUR BREAKUP!


What the eff is he talking about?!  It's like he just plopped his crazy down right in front of me and said ,"See... I'm nuts.... I going to accuse you of something we both know you didn't do.. but rather that I did in your name to make people hate you"


WHAT?!?!?!?!?!??!!?!?


This is what I've suspected he's done with his friends and family for our entire relationship (IE the mean comments and me never meeting anyone)  BUT PUT IT IN MY FACE LIKE THAT!!!  OBVIOUSLY I KNOW THE TRUTH!!  IT"S INSANE!!!!!!


Completely taken back by this one.  And I'm the crazy one.

I'm so floored and pissed at crazy world I couldn't even write this out well.  omg.